Party planning

At my son's soccer game (4 yr. old's playing soccer... hilarious!), my 5 yr old daughter leaned over and said, "Mom, I think it's time we plan where we are going for my birthday."
(?? ...birthday is 2 months away)"Okay, what are you thinking?"
"Well, I was thinking we could go to Hawaii for my birthday."
My husband leaned over and, without batting an eye, reassured her, "If you pay for us to fly to Hawaii, we'll go to Hawaii for your birthday."
"How much will it cost?"
"About $3,000. But I'll make a deal. If you pay for our family to fly there, I will pay for the food and hotel."
"Okay. I think that I will need another party here, though, because I don't think all my friends can go to Hawaii. I'll check my piggy bank when we get home."
"Okay, you do that."

Well, she went and counted all $1.52 in her piggy bank and informed us that she wanted to buy a toy in Hawaii, too, so she didn't have money for the toy AND flying us all out. She asked us what she could do.
"Well, I guess you better start saving for next year. Or you could try asking Grandma and Grandpa."

Grandma and Grandpa?

One more dream

While I'm talking about dreams, I thought that I would write another crazy dream I had last month.

I had been wanting to start exercising, but had been feeling too lousy and tired. One day, I started to get frustrated with myself, because even when I finally wasn't dehydrated, I was still so tired and out of breath, I could hardly do anything. I wondered if it was just in my mind, or maybe lack of will power.

That night I dreamed that I was working on my thesis, and several different professors I was working with me informed me that my blood work showed that I had cytopenia. Umm... okay. I had no idea what that meant. But it was so vivid that when I awoke, I looked it up. And sure enough, it was a word. It meant low blood count. Now, in nursing, we talk about subsets of cytopenia, like anemia or neutropenia, but I seriously don't remember ever using the word cytopenia, and neither did some other nurses I talked to. But as soon as I read the definition, it hit me, "of course! I'm just anemic! That's totally normal in pregnancy... especially because I had been too sick to keep down any prenatal vitamins.

So thanks to my dream, I made sure to take my prenatal vitamins and eat more iron, and have since started feeling better. Kind of cool, huh.

Dreams come true

I loved college. I loved going to classes. I loved learning. I loved BYU's campus. I loved the social life. If I could relive one part of my life, that would be it. So when I had 2 dreams in a row that I was back on campus, walking around, taking classes, I awoke both mornings feeling alive and excited to start my day. Which is saying something, since getting up means throwing up.

So after day 2, it suddenly hit me, "I CAN do that! I can go to BYU's education week!" When I realized that, I cried for 30 minutes (okay, I blame the tears on pregnancy hormones). Rob had mentioned going to Education Week earlier, but I didn't really take it seriously, because that would entail finding sitters. One of the last times I needed that for a work meeting, it took rotating my kids to 4 different homes, every 2 hours, and even then one person called me while I was at my work meeting to inform me that her kids were just diagnosed with strep. STRESSFUL! And that was only one day! So the chance of me finding sitters for several days sounded impossible. But after these dreams... the impossible was going to somehow be possible.

Well, miracle of miracles, here I am... 3 days into Education Week and loving it! I've been staying with my brother and his wife in Pleasant Grove so I don't have to commute very much. I have been going to classes 10-12 hours a day... basically until I am too exhausted to keep going. I've been to classes on parenting, several on spiritual topics, the middle east, organization, music, a charity organization in India, etc. It has been fantastic. I've also loved hanging out with my brother and his wife, and I'm going to visit my other brother and his fam. who just moved here from Chicago 2 days ago.

I'm living my week up. Already I have felt more love and faith and healing. Ideas to help me go back home and be a better parent and enjoy my life more. Ooh... God knew that I needed this!

me being a good mom

When describing my family, I always use one word. Artists And although only one of my siblings actually gets paid being an artist, every one of them is extremely artistic, whether with music, paint, or rooms. And while I feel like the least artistic of my fam, I still live on the time I spend dabbling with paint or music. Years ago, when I visualized myself in the far future, I could see myself painting in the back of my (clean) home, with kids arriving home from school. It was seriously like a vision to me.

So you'd think as a stay-at-home mom, I would be up to my elbows in art projects with my kids. You'd think. Here's the problem: I'm a little too OCD. Before I even start the projects, all I can see is the mess of paper, paint in the hair, damage to who-knows-what, and clean-up time. I love taking them to places where they can do art projects. I'm not one of those moms who fix my kid's projects to make them look right.grrrrrf I don't care how many eyes or ears my kids' puppets have. They can be as creative as they want. As long as I don't have to have the mess in my kitchen.

Here is my shameless pat-on-the back. Despite the fact that my house was a disaster (last night I was too sick to clean and I was gone all morning), I decided to be a mother and went outside in the garage and helped paint a box with my kids. Paint it into a little house. I did have to hold my breath so I didn't waste this good will getting upset about the paint on shirts, hair, etc. But -pat-pat- I did it and got a picture to prove it.

Rays shining through

There are those moments that make motherhood SO worth it. Today was one.

I awoke with the kids playing quietly in the other room (thanks to my husband), when Kyle came in to check on me. I offered to help him make his bed, but after a couple minutes, he got excited. "Let's do secret service!" he said, so we both went in to Bekah's room to make her bed. Bekah must have heard us, because she promptly informed us that we couldn't come out of the bedrooms because SHE was doing secret service in the kitchen. So 20 min. later, I found myself enjoying breakfast on our new patio furniture with 2 happy kids, all the bedrooms cleaned, and the dishwasher emptied. And I hadn't even asked for this goodness.

The rest of the day has been a delight. Lunch with "Aunt Chris" ... my old neighbor who is an adopted family member. Reading books with the kids. Now they are at a baseball game with Rob (and there was NO sigh of relief when they left with their dad). Nothing grand, just simple goodness. The sun is definitely breaking through my clouds.

When it rains it pours

We are doing well, although it seems to be one crisis after another. Three months ago, I remember saying out loud how we didn't really have any problems in our lives. I am so glad that I recognized and enjoyed it then. That calm before the storm. Between house, health, and family crises, we are perservering. No one has died and Rob still has a job that he loves, so that is great. I mean GREAT!

Speaking of one drop in the deluge, I am now 4 months pregnant, and still sick... which is actually getting worse rather than better. Once I throw up over a hundred times, I confess my attitude becomes more cynical. I just can't get on top of it, and walk around feeling so dehydrated, even when I keep things down. Yet I know this is better than last pregnancy. Rob has been absolutely FANTASTIC... and that does deserve capitals. From fixing broken appliances, cooking when I can't, handling plumbers and flooding, a shoulder to cry on, giving good council, etc. etc. Some trials are worth going through just to appreciate and grow closer to those around you. And I am not just talking about my husband right now, I am talking to the rest of my family, too.

So I am grateful. Under this layer of cynicism and hurt, I am grateful. Or if I am not at this exact moment, I know I will be. I truly believe that we will come out better in the end by clinging to each other and God.

Guess who is riding a bike?

I took off the training wheels for good Monday night and let him have a little go. He did pretty well. Then today, he decided he wanted to master it by himself. Just turned 4 and he's riding a 2-wheel bike! Whoohoo! Best of all, I only had to run behind him, holding on to the bike like 10 min. Monday night. That's it!

The boy was meant to ride.