"Is it hard being a mom?"

I was at Time Out for Women a month ago and a speaker shared a hilarious experience. Her child came up and asked her if it was hard to be a mom. As she paused for a moment, contemplating how to answer ("maybe an 8 out of 10 in hardness"), her child answered. "Like, is it so hard that sometimes you wish you were a dad?"

Babies are consuming. Seriously. So while I have been consumed with feeding, soothing, changing, (and trying to find a few minutes to sleep), Rob has stepped up as Mr. Mom. Bless his heart, he is doing a great job! But there have been some funny moments. Like Rob's first day on the job when he dropped off my son to preschool with no coat. Or shoes. Or hair done (okay, that was a gimme). (Thank goodness my kids dress themselves!)

But truth be told, my Mr. Mom has been wonderful. Trying to figure out how to do housework to meet my standards. Becoming much stricter (while still being his loving, fun self) with the kids. Going to work when he was sick because he figured it was better to be sick away from the baby. Trying to still juggle big deadlines and pressure at work over conference calls and late-night emails. Handling my occasional breakdown with compassion and forgiveness. Even baking Christmas cookies with the kids tonight (I don't even do that!).

So he may not be able to remember to move the laundry to the dryer while trying to help a child do homework and cooking dinner. Most importantly, he is full of love, and is more gentle with me than I am with myself.

I am very blessed.

Welcome

12-11-10, welcome little Stephen!

He is beautiful! The birth went great, and Rob was there! Rob flew in from Minneapolis (just missing the Big storm by a day that delayed flights and left a huge hole in the roof of the Metrodome) late Friday night, and Saturday afternoon, our baby was born. My labor was only 1.5 hours, and I actually went to the hospital not because I was in labor, but because I caught my son's stomache bug and couldn't keep anything down.

Although delirious from fatigue, I just wanted to write a few thoughts.

How can I love a little being so much who can't even make eye contact with me yet? Sappy, but true.

Yesterday he started waking up and spending time looking around. The first several days, it is just eat, sleep, or cry, but last evening he started spending a half an hour here and there looking up at the world. It is amazing. Everything is new. Lights, faces, feelings, touch. Yet when I talk to him, he responds just a little... perhaps that is one thing that he remembers.

And I forgot what it actually means when you say that babies have their days and nights mixed up. How can he sleep so much during the day, and then be up so much at night! Rob's been sleeping in the living room so he can get up with the kids and get them ready for school. We figured at least one of us can get some sleep. But after having a small meltdown at dinner, I am realizing that someone needs to be me tonight. :) Thankfully I have a good husband who wants to help.

Happy Thanksgiving

My kids and I had fun making our Thanksgiving tree. We keep adding leaves each day with things that we are thankful for. It's been good to focus on what we HAVE rather than what we WANT as Christmas gets nearer.

In case you were interested

Just found out that my hubby's on a U of U promotional video out on youtube. So for anyone that wants to know what he does, here it is. He's the hot one with a beard. He didn't even know about it until someone at work commented that they had seen it. Pretty cool.

Anxiety

As this baby's due date approaches, my anxiety level has increased about it. First off, it's been almost 5 years since I've done this baby-thing. Second, because it is so close to Christmas, I feel like I need to have Christmas all done and ready... which is anxiety producing for every mother. Third, it's a new baby... and while I believe this will be a healthy baby, I've had a sick, very difficult baby before and know what that's like.

Yesterday, I was telling Rob about how I'm getting nervous as we now have about 5 weeks before induction. I asked Rob if he was getting nervous at all. You know what he was nervous about? Getting a new car.

Seriously. Such a man.
This commercial proves that it's not just my man either:

In response

... okay, okay, confession: I am addicted to homemade salsa. Especially with this pregnancy. I can down 1/3 a pint of salsa in one day. Easy. If there is no salsa, I'm not even tempted by chips. But if I run out of chips, I have eaten just a spoonful of salsa (seriously? That's as bad as drinking pickle juice... which I did once). I don't know how I can throw up so much, but keep down salsa. I must be growing a Texan inside of me.

She's up on her box again

Other than when we travel, we rarely go fast food. Probably once every 2 months. I confess though, the temptation is greater, now that I'm pregnant & drive past 2 fast food places & see about 4 more just to get on the freeway.

Tonight I finally saw Super Size Me. It has got me thinking! Not that anything new was presented in the movie. The guy ate like 5000 calories a day... high sugar & fat no less. But it has gotten me thinking about what kind of memories and habits I am establishing for my children. I grew up in a home that did not have much candy or junk food around. When we were hungry, I still remember my mom saying, "Go eat an apple!" My parents have a letter I wrote them in elementary school that includes complaints that I did not get to eat all the junk food my friends did. They now have the letter framed. Look at how all of my siblings eat. None of us really like candy or junk food (except maybe Jonathan and his BBQ chips:).

So, even though my determination was wavering before watching the show tonight, I guess I will continue to pack my kids lunches with fruit and whole wheat PBJ's and can fresh fruits and jam all summer. And try and figure out the eternal dilemma of what I am going to cook for dinner.

I see the horrible effects of obesity on kids. It breaks my heart to see some kids come into the Instacare where I work. I can see their parents would do almost anything for their kids, but what the kids REALLY need is to learn healthy eating habits. Not only for their health, but also for self-esteem. I am committed to not let that happen to my kids if I can help it! Really, I don't care if they are thin - I don't want them to focus on being skinny... that is equally unhealthy and dangerous! I just want them to have healthy bodies and make healthy choices (at least most of the time). We Mormons talk about the Word of Wisdom a lot. One of the things is to not drink alcohol, but another equally important part of it is to eat meat sparingly and increase whole grains and vegetables. Think of how many people are addicted to food!

So one other thing that I began over a year ago (thanks to hearing about some big studies from my friend Cindy in NY) is reducing our meat and eating vegetarian about 1-2 times a week. I figure that's at least trying to eat meat sparingly. While none of us will eat veggie-burgers, there are so many great recipes on line that it has been easy to find good meat-free-meals. The other day we had delicious butternut sqaush and apple soup that left our guests asking for the recipe. Easy, too. One interesting blog is Meatlessmealsformeateaters.blogspot.com. Turns out that the writer is a friend of Rob's from Houston.

Sorry I'm standing on my soapbox tonight! I guess it's from post-halloween toxicity. Lately, my son has been asking for candy about 1 hour after breakfast. What? NO!